Thursday, 26 May 2011

Float like a butterfly, stung by a bee.

Just a short post this time, to update you on the training situation mainly.

This week, whilst training, I cycled in to a bee and it got stuck inside my t-shirt. Whilst it was stinging me on the collar bone, did I panic? Did I stop cycling and flap about like a big girl's blouse? No. I kept on going. (Well, OK, so I panicked a small amount. What do you expect? I am only human!) I was timing myself and was not going to let anything stop me. Even an angry bee trapped inside my t-shirt did not put me off. I just cycled on and tried to flick it out of my t-shirt in a rather ungainly fashion.

In just getting back from the hairdressers I have given myself even more of a scare. I realised that I had asked him for a haircut very specifically. I did it without even thinking. The words just came tumbling out of my mouth before I could think. "It needs to be short enough to go in to a swimming cap, but long enough to be pinned back for running." What on earth am I saying?! Normally no such things even enter my mind. Am I deranged or just triathlon obsessed?

The answer is simple. I am taking this triathlon far too seriously and it has to stop!

I am cycling through the pain. I am doing interval training in the gym. I am worrying if I have not done enough training and if I do not hurt the morning after a training session, I feel like I have failed. Surely this is some kind of triathlon monster, not the real me. I even considered stopping drinking, but before that madness took control I gave myself a sharp talking to that seemed to work wonders.

Perhaps when this is all over I will be able to go back to being a normal person who goes to the gym three times a week and feels proud of that. Perhaps I will look outside and think 'Oooh, that rain will be good for the garden' rather than 'Hmmmm, is it too rainy to go for a bike ride'. Perhaps I won't spend a few minutes of each day thinking about what a difference the money we have raised will make. But I hope not. I hope that these trials and tribulations will have changed me a little, but changed me permanently, and reminded me of the big difference that these small changes can make to everyday lives.

Breakthrough Breast Cancer

Leukaemia and Lymphoma Research


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